I Don't Know You
by Sam-453
Summary: Alternate reality after 'And Jesus Bought the Casserole'- life in Manticore is very different for Max.
1. Default Chapter

Disclaimer: I do not own any part of Dark Angel

Feedback: Please write me reviews on what you think. It would be really helpful.

Notes:What if life in manticore went very differently for Max after "and Jesus bought the casserole". What if Manticore had discovered a new way to deal with problematic X5's? Basically- an alternate reality.

Chapter 1 

Max had been in Manticore for almost three months. She had been through all types of torture she knew of, but still held on the hope that one day she would get out, one day someone would come to save her. But there was always that nagging at the back of her mind, repeating the same taunts- _Ah, but no one will come, will they? They all think you're dead! Even Logan, Krit and Sil, even Lydecker._ Max had not given Renfro anything, she had kept all the secrets that she held within both her mind and heart, and slowly, as she had been taught, Max was forgetting them. Every memory of her outside life, everything that she would otherwise eventually betray to the enemy. Again this produced a voice in her head, reminding her that once she lost that, she would have nothing left to hold on to, and she would belong to Manticore. _But that doesn't matter,_ she sighed inwardly, _as long as they are safe, as long as it is not possible for me to betray them, it doesn't matter what happens to me._

Renfro knew what Max was doing. She knew that in time, X5-452 would be hers. However, she also knew enough about Max to be sure that once she had gained Renfro's trust, the chances are Max would be able to recall the memories, and turn against Manticore once more. This presented a problem, so she had teams of scientists working overtime to figure out an alternative. After a further two months of torture, and traditional methods, Renfro hit the jackpot.

            "When the procedure is complete, emotions will mean nothing to her. She's a fighter, so it'll take time, but she will snap, and then, she will be your perfect soldier, to do with what you will." Renfro smiled grimly, looking through the sound proof glass at the thin, limp form that was once Max Guevara.

            "So what are we waiting for?"

            "Just your command Ma'am." She nodded,

            "Then do it."

A year later

            "Logan? You up already?" Bling yawned; they'd been working late last night so he'd stayed over. Logan looked slightly guilty.

            "No, actually, I'm still up." Bling shook his head and looked over Logan's shoulder, catching a glimpse of the file Logan had just closed. He looked at his friend in disbelief.

            "Manticore? You're looking into Manticore, _again_? Logan, this shit is gonna get you killed, just like it nearly has done plenty of times!" Logan would not meet Bling's eyes, but he answered.

            "I have to Bling. I'm eyes-only, eyes-only takes out the bad guys, Manticore are bad guys."

            "Yeah right. You don't seriously think I'm gonna believe that that is all this is. It's still all about her. Isn't it? Logan, it's been nearly a year and a half. She is dead. I'm sorry, ok? She was a good friend, but she's gone. You have to let go!" Logan bought up a snap shot of the video footage from the attack on Manticore on the screen. It was a clear view of Max's face, looking up at the camera. Logan touched it gently.

            "I can't. I can't help feeling that some how she is still out there."

            "But she's not, Logan! She's dead! She died in your arms!" Logan spun round, screaming in his friends face,

            "I KNOW! Of course I know that! But it's not that easy Bling. I've continued with life, I've left her behind, but it doesn't mean I'm gonna forget the best, most amazing person I ever met in my life. I loved her Bling, and if it takes me the rest of my life to destroy Manticore for taking her away from me, then so be it."

Manticore-

The X5 group were all lined up in the yard for inspection. Each of them stood perfectly straight, perfectly still. There were gaps in the line in places, due to the effects of the breeding program that had replaced the DNA lab. Renfro walked along the line and as she came to each soldier, they would salute. She ordered,

            "State your designation." And they answered with their X-number. Moving along the line, Renfro came to a short girl with dark hair, tied roughly back in ponytail.

            "State your designation." The X-5 answered immediately,

            "X-5452, Ma'am!" Renfro smiled, she couldn't help it. She was very proud of her triumph over 452. The soldier before her was emotionless, driven only by orders, and only looking out for those assigned to her group. She was ruthless, and she belonged to Manticore. An X-5 had come to 452 about two months ago, asking for help in escape, she had actually been sent, as a test, but of course 452 did not know that. She had smiled at the girl, then punched her lights out. When 452 reported to Renfro with the unconscious 'traitor' in her arms, Renfro finally knew that she had won.

            "452!" she barked,

            "Ma'am?"

            "Report to my office. I will join you after inspection." 

            "Yes Ma'am." She answered, saluting again, then marching toward the building. _This will be fun,_ thought Renfro, _Almost…poetic. What better way to seal 452's imprisonment? What better way to deal with eyes-only once and for all?_

452 rode towards Seattle, one thought in her mind, the mission. She had been ordered to take the information Manticore had so far collected on the cyber journalist known only as 'Eyes-Only', find him, and kill him. She'd been told that the search had been consolidated to two or three sectors of Seattle, so that's where she was headed. This was a deep cover mission. She was to rent an apartment, wear civi's and only report in once a week for an up date. She didn't intend to be out in this filthy, diseased, corrupt world for anywhere near a week though.

            Two days later, she was set up in a small room in the centre of town. She had two laptop computers and plenty of other hi-tech equipment that only the government could possible afford. She sat on the hard bed and went through all the eyes-only files, again and again. Just waiting for the small square TV to be interrupted by a hack. The stills of previous hacks that she now held in her hand stirred nothing in the shell that used to be a lively, friendly girl. She had told Renfro that she had no idea who eyes-only was, and she was being entirely truthful. 452 knew that Eyes-only mightn't do another hack for weeks, but she still felt that tracing a hack would be quicker than chasing his informants across the whole of America. However, minutes later, the screen flickered, and those familiar blue eyes starred out from it. 452 went immediately to the computer, typing frantically, she soon found a link. Knowing that time was ticking away, knowing that it had been declared many times that it was not possible to track eyes-only, 452 continued relentlessly. Eventually she reached the blockade of security measures he'd set up, and she froze, just for a moment. She'd never seen much complex defences before, not in any training. But the next second, she found herself typing once more, slipping silently through eyes-only's drag nets, totally unaware of how she knew what to do.

Logan watched the clock carefully as he spoke, knowing that going over sixty seconds would get him caught. Under sixty, no one except him would be able to track this hack. And that was only because he knew the exact measures he'd taken to prevent tracking. 55, 56, 57,

            "Peace…out." He cut the connection with one second to go, and smiled.

Only a few miles away, 452 had a similar expression as she looked at the address on the screen. The Pent-House, Fogle Towers. _Bingo!_

             Without a thought to the ease in which she'd broken through Eyes-Only's systems, 452 headed to the address, planning to finish the mission and get back to base, where she would be praised for destroying Eyes-only so quickly. She made her way to the rooftop of "Fogle Towers", in the centre of sector 9, the high-rise district. _Fancy_, she thought as she crossed the roof, _it figures though. Some one as dirty as Eyes only, with as much equipment as eyes only must have, would have to be a rich bitch, no doubt about it. _She found a skylight, removed it, and listened intently for any sound from within. Silence. She lowered herself down carefully, headfirst, to quickly scan the scene. The penthouse was dark, but the skylight opened onto a passage along one side, so she could not tell whether anyone was home. _Only one way to find out…_ She came back up, and descended on a rope. As she touched down, she flung the rope back up through the skylight. This would make a quick exit slightly riskier, but she had a weird gut feeling that leaving the rope hanging would get her caught. With no more sound than a shadow, 452 began to search the apartment. Reaching the living room area, she very nearly missed the figure standing by the dark window. She held her breath without even meaning to. His back to her, the man had a good figure, he was tall, but she could not make out hair colour in the dark. The man stood completely still and seemed to be deep in thought. 452 reached for her silenced hand gun and levelled it at her target. 

            "Hands where I can see them. Turn round _very_ slowly and walk into the light." She flipped the light switch beside her at the same time. The man jumped, but was not dumb enough to spin round. 452 knew that letting him see her was risky, but the rest of her brain was yelling other orders. _You have to determine whether or not this is really eyes-only. Don't worry about letting him see you, he wont live to tell anyone._ And then another voice, one that she did not understand… _I have to see him_…

            Logan began to turn very slowly round, his hands held up in the air. His head was ringing from those few words, because it was impossible, ridiculous, but he knew that voice. He would know that voice anywhere. When the intruder came into view, he saw a beautiful girl, about twenty, with long dark hair pulled back into a ponytail. She was dressed all in black, and her face… her face was the most radiant thing he had ever seen. It was a face that came to him every night in his dreams, and nightmares, it was a face that he had longed to behold in person for a year and a half, and it was masked in terrible confusion.

            452 found her breath coming quicker, her heart thumping so loud she thought it might deafen her, and she didn't know why. When the man had turned, she was shocked by the effect it had on her. She could not tear her gaze from those crystal blue eyes. She knew now that this was after all eyes-only, she had studied the stills for days and would know those eyes anywhere. What she couldn't work out was why his face was a stricken jumble of emotion. Terror was the obvious one, but woven into it was joy, longing, confusion, and dread. But the latter, she could tell, was not dread of her, but of something else. Not of the fact that he was very close to being shot, but perhaps that she was going to shoot him? _Well that makes no sense. We've never met. It's him, just finish it. _Then the odd voice returned,_ but it's **him**._ 452, sick of this ridiculous confusion, decided to get on with it, finish the job, then return to Manticore to figure out what was going on. Do the job, ask questions later. But as she was about to, as she placed her finger on the trigger and took aim, he gasped,

            "Max?" and her world fell apart around her. She still didn't understand it; she really had no idea why she was acting like this over a stranger. In fact, not only a stranger, a threat to national security who must be destroyed before he does some serious damage, _or that's what you've been told_, taunted the odd voice, _who gave you permission to set up shop in my head?_ She almost yelled it mentally, at the same time as knowing how crazy that was. She took aim again, but no matter how hard she tried, she could not pull the trigger. She physically could not do it.

            Logan watched in confusion as his love seemed to fight herself. He did not understand how she was alive, or what exactly was happening, but he did know, however terrifying it was, that if he hadn't said "Max" a minute ago, he'd probably be dead now. But he could see the pain she was in, even though he wasn't sure of the cause of the pain. He wanted to help her. He reached out one hand, saying

            "Max…"

            "Shut up! Hands up!" She snapped, actually shaking now. He did as he was told. Then 452 continued, she seemed to be talking more to herself than to him, but she spoke out loud. The real reason was that her head was so full of thoughts that out loud was the only way to hear herself. "I have a job to do. I must eliminate Eyes-Only!" Then to him "You _are_ Eyes only, right?" it seemed like a plea, and in his shocked state, Logan answered immediately, and truthfully,

            "Yes." 

            "Then… then… you are my target, I have to kill you."


	2. Mirror Girl

Chapter 2 

 452 was beginning to calm down, but Logan wasn't sure if that was good or bad. "I have to" she repeated, keeping the gun trained on him, finger on the trigger. Then, in a barely audible voice, she reached a decision, "But not today." She turned and was gone before Logan could even process what she had said. She leapt straight up through the skylight and replaced the top, then fled, not understanding the tears flowing freely down her cheeks.

            Logan felt dazed. He sat sideways on the couch, starring at the spot on which she'd stood. If there hadn't been a wet trail of footprint from under the skylight, he would have thought he'd imagined the whole thing. Max was alive. More, Max was alive and he had left her in Manticore for almost a year and a half. Max was here. Max was in this apartment. These thoughts clouded his mind, allowing nothing else in, except one question, _how?_ When he could finally move again, he picked up the phone and called the only person he could think of who might understand. He had no way of contacting any of Max's sibs, not even Krit and Sil, so he went for next best thing,

            "Yo, you got Original Cindy here." 

            "Cindy? Thank god you're in."

            "Logan? What ch'you talking about? Wha's wrong?" here Logan stumbled, not knowing how to say what he needed to, and thinking that it probably wasn't wise to say it on the phone anyway.

            "I have to talk to you. Can you come over?"

            "What, now? It's the middle of the night!"

            "I know, I'm sorry, but it's important." Sensing the urgency in his voice, Cindy conceded,

            "Ai-ight, I'll be right there."

                        452 paced up and down the small room. Every time she turned the right way, she would see her reflection in the full-length mirror that hung on one wall. Her cheeks were stained red with tears. She'd been crying since she left the apartment, and she still didn't know why. The image sickened her. It made her feel weak, pathetic, and constantly reminded her of …_him_. She didn't dare to even think his name. She knew it, from the files she'd dug up on him, but thinking about his name made him a person, instead of a target. But it wasn't just that. Those few moments that she had stood starring into his fathomless eyes, she had felt as if some leaden hand had gripped her heart. She had felt feelings that she had never, in her memory, felt before. She didn't understand what they meant. She didn't know the names of emotions like that. She had no use for them. Emotions were phoney sentimentality. So why did she crumble when she saw him? On top of all that, a couple of times, as she turned, she saw the reflection out of the corner of her eye, and instead of seeing 452, Manticore soldier, she saw a girl who resembled her, but wasn't, couldn't, be her. Her hair was loose, flowing over her shoulders; she wore jeans and a leather jacket over a blue t-shirt. Thumbs tucked into the pockets of the jeans, she stood there, smiling. When 452 turned completely the girl was gone.  She turned again to face the mirror, frustrated and angry with herself, she thrust a fist into her own reflection, shattering the glass. As blood welled up in the various cuts on her hand, she collapsed to the floor, rocking back and forth, cradling her hand and sobbing.

            Cindy sat in stunned silence. Logan had recounted the evening's events, and she hadn't said a word since he'd finished.

            "You're sure it was really her? I mean, not to dis you Logan, but I know how much you miss her. Are you sure you didn't imagine it?"

            "You saw the muddy wet footprints."

            "O.K. so someone broke in here, but that doesn't mean it was Max…"

            "I saw her!"

            "Logan, cool it. I just wanna be sure. I know what it feels like. She was my best friend. I loved her too. D'you know the amount of times I've seen people on the street and run up to them, thinking they're Max? An' then I get close and they look nothing like her. The first few weeks, everyone I saw was Max cos I knew she couldn't be dead. It didn't matter that you saw her die. It didn't matter that I knew she was shot. She was Max, and she wouldn't leave me!" tears rolled down her cheeks as her voice reached a crescendo. Logan couldn't speak immediately. He rested a comforting hand on her shoulder, knowing exactly what she meant.

            "I know, Cindy. I'm sorry. If it wasn't for those prints, I'd have thought I was dreaming too. And I even considered that maybe it was some random burglar who I just convinced myself was Max. Except that I know it wasn't. It was … different. It was her Cindy." She nodded slowly, wiping tears from her eyes, smudging make-up across her cheeks. Then she looked at Logan oddly,

            "So you're Eyes-Only?" Logan was startled.

            "Oh shit! I totally forgot that you didn't know. I just had to tell someone about this and I didn't even think!"

            "It's ok Logan, I'm not gonna tell. It's actually kinda cool." She smiled slightly.

            452 was driving again, not knowing where she was going, just driving. She didn't stop until she reached an abandoned building in the middle of squatter land. She looked up at the enormous structure, and wondered why she was here. 

            From the top of the space needle, she gazed out across the city. The air was fresher up here, the noise subdued, and the city actually looked beautiful. 452 tried desperately to understand what was going on in her head. Logan Cale, a.k.a. Eyes-only, her target, a threat to national security, her big break, had stopped her in her tracks. She had been physically unable to pull that trigger, and she didn't know why. She had a dreadful feeling of familiarity about this whole place. Everywhere she turned, she felt that inner part of herself smile, as if to say, _we're home_. As she stood on the very edge of the roof, face into the wind, she could almost let that part take over. It was so strong, willing her to remember these feelings that scared her so much. But there was always that harder part too. Screaming orders that made no more sense than the other voice, _don't you dare!_ It yelled, _How can you even consider it? They left you! They abandoned you! They gave you to Manticore, so that's where you're meant to be! _ 452 dropped into a crouch, holding her head in her hands. None of this made sense! She had never been to Seattle before, so why did she know it so well? She had never been assigned to eyes only before, never even tried to crack his codes, so how did she do it so quickly? She'd never been to that apartment before, so why did everything seem so familiar? She prayed for something that made sense, something to hold on to, somewhere to start…

            "Hello?" the voice was quiet and shaky, and gave 452 a start. How had she not heard someone approach? She stood, and turned to face the girl standing at the top of the slope. When the girl saw her face, she gasped. "Oh my god! It really is you." But she didn't move. 452 fought the urge she had to smile, to greet this girl like an old friend, because the other half of her mind told her that she was a stranger, or worse, an Eyes-only operative. Without a word, she tried to walk straight passed the girl. But she grabbed her arm, "Max?" she said, almost pleading. 452 stopped, not because of the girls grip, she could break that easily, but because of the name. Without turning, she whispered,

            "Why do you people keep calling me that?" the girl didn't answer, she was obviously stricken. "Huh? Why? I don't know you!" The girl shook her head.

            "But Max, I'm Cindy. Original Cindy? Only your best friend for over a year before you left…"

            "Left? What do you mean before I left? I've never been here before in my life. I think you have the wrong girl." Cindy seemed at a loss. Maybe Max really was gone. Then she had an idea.

            "So you ain't X5-452? Barcode number-332960073452?" 452 now gasped. That was ridiculous! She had finally managed to separate the two voices, deciding that the soft one was just imagination, and all this 'Max' business was just a coincidence. But that girl, Cindy, had just confirmed that in fact, 'Max' was X5-452. Cindy was nothing to do with Manticore, 452 knew that. And there is no way Eyes only could have made her this quickly. So the only way that Cindy could know that stuff, is if she really did know 452. Which meant that Manticore had lied…

            "No!" she yelled. Even Cindy knew it wasn't in answer to the question. She wrenched her armed free, "Leave, me alone! They wouldn't lie! I don't know you!" with this, she pushed the girls outstretched arm with a little more force than necessary. Cindy lost her balance, and slipped. She tumbled and rolled down the slope, screaming all the way. As she neared the edge, images were flashing through 452's mind, and at the last second, a scream was torn from her,

            "CINDY!" she dove for the edge, arms out-reached, and grabbed the girls wrist as she dropped out of sight. She pulled her up, and they embraced, clamped together on the very edge. 452 was still confused, but she now knew for sure that something was very wrong on the Manticore end.


	3. The Truth

Chapter 3 

A little while later, the two were sitting awkwardly inside. 452 said the only thing she could get out clearly,

            "You alright?" Cindy looked up at her,

            "Yeah I'm fine. I'm just as fine as the last time you asked, five seconds ago." Her face broke into a smile. "I still can't believe its really you." 452 shook her head slightly.

            "But I'm not even sure it is. What do you even mean by that? Cos' I only remember Manticore… an bits of other stuff that makes no sense." Cindy took a deep breath.

            "I'll tell you what I know, but don't freak out if you don't believe me, ok?" 452 nodded, "ai-aight. You escaped from Manticore Bu. In '09, with a whole load of your sibs." 452 cut her off,

            "No! You're wrong. I'm not a traitor! I was not involved in that escape!"

            "Yes you were. But you're no traitor. It's Manticore that's wrong. You kids escaped because you were treated like something you scrape off the bottom of your shoe! The way you told me, you were havin' a seizure, and they tried to take you away, just like they did to your bro' Jack, who you later saw dead. Your sibs freaked, and refused to let 'em take you. Your sis' Eva grabbed the guard's gun and you tried to run for it. Lydecker shot Eva. After that, you guys just split, twelve or thirteen of you." 452 had continuously tried to interrupt, but shut up at the mention of Eva. _Eva…_ 452 couldn't prevent the images crossing her mind as the story was told. The jolting memory of her dead sister bought at least part of it back. _So I did escape. We escaped._ But then what about her memories of Manticore? She looked up at Cindy, and the other girl could see that 452 believed her. "You know it, don't you?" 452 nodded slowly.

            "Then why was I at Manticore? Why do I remember being at Manticore all this time?" Cindy swallowed; this was going to be the tricky bit.

            "I can't tell you all that, but I know when, and why you ended up back in Manticore." Off 452's nod, she continued, "It was about a year and five months ago. You and 3 o' your sibs went to Manticore to destroy the DNA lab. Don't ask the technicalities 'cos that's as technical as I get. Anyway, you got shot, Zack got caught. Logan saw you die. He didn't want to leave you, but Lydecker forced him. They thought you were dead, Bu. We all thought you were dead." Confusion was evident on 452's face. Slowly, clearly attempting to unravel memories, what was true, what wasn't and what was sort-of both.

            "Lydecker betrayed manticore. He helped a group of X5's to destroy the lab. A little less than a year and a half ago, the same time as the attack, I was on a mission with my brother… 599. We both got shot. Him in the head, me in the chest. They used his heart… it was the only was to save me." Cindy gasped, realising what must have really happened, because Zack never got fatally shot. He was just caught. "What?" 452 asked.

            "That mission story has to be the cover up for what happened when you destroyed the lab. But Zack got caught Max, not killed." 452 flinched at the use of the name everyone said was hers. "From what I've heard, Zack woulda done anything for you. If he thought you were gonna die…" She dared not continue. She didn't know exactly what had happened, and airing her thoughts probably wasn't a good idea when Max… 452 was in this state. 

            "They said that I had amnesia after the injury, due to blood loss or something. That's why I barely remembered the last ten years. There were always weird déjà vu moments, but nothing compared to when I saw him. I had weird dreams, shit like that, but it all stayed as dreams. It never stirred anything inside me; it never really meant a thing. But his face… I couldn't kill him. I just don't understand." Cindy bit her lip. Could she really tell Max this? Was it her place? 

            "Girl, I don't know everything. I don't know how Manticore made you remember stuff that never happened, and I can't tell you your own feelings. I think you need to remember by yourself, if that's possible. All I do know is that you are not just X5-452. You are Max Guevara, wicked friend, total hunny and kinda a super-heroine, and that Manticore are the bad-guys." 452 shook her head.

            "No! They can't be!" the taunting voices had started up once again, reminding her of the past year. "Manticore can't be bad!"

            "But they are! You've said it yourself, they're misleading you, lying to you…"

            "But they can't be bad! Don't you see? If they're bad, then… I'm bad. I've worked for Manticore for a year, even if what you're saying is true. The things I've done…"She seemed to be despairing, and Cindy finally understood the major denial. "The things… they had to be for a good cause. I wouldn't… I couldn't…"

            "Max…" Cindy said, trying to be soothing, she reached out, touching the other girl's arm. But 452 slapped it away.

            "Don't call me that! Don't touch me!" she backed away, like a scared animal, and headed for the stairs.

            "Max! Max please!" Cindy yelled after her, but of course, she was too fast.  

Manticore-

Renfro was in a good mood. 452 had been gone for a few days, and would hopefully soon return to tell her she had killed her own lover! Ha! If she ever fell out of line again, how easy it would be to crush her with that fact. She was snapped out of her fantasy by a knock on the door.

            "Come in."

            "Ma'am." Answered the X5 who entered. "I have a request." Interested, Renfro asked him to continue, not noticing that he hadn't closed the door. "I realise that it isn't exactly normal procedure, but I wondered if you might reconsider the punishment of X5-734." Renfro raised her eyebrows, he continued. "It's just that she didn't really do anything wrong. She was just real tired, after the mission, I think it's unfair that you punish her so severely for such a small mistake." Renfro was angry, but curious. She'd been watching this one. She already had the feeling that the only reason he hadn't started a rebellion was the fact that he had a roof over his head, food to eat, what was the point? He was not there because he was loyal. But still, this wasn't like him.

            "Is it your place to question my judgement, 494?" He swallowed,

            "No Ma'am."

            "So why are you here?" he looked a little confused,

            "To request…"

            "I know that you idiot! If I feel like punishing her, then I'll punish her! It has nothing to do with you! You think that punishment was harsh, do you? Well I can do a lot worse." He then snapped back,

            "But she didn't do anything, and you gave her a punishment that a traitor might get!" he yelled. Infuriated, she told him something she really shouldn't have,

            "I don't care! She annoys me! OK _soldier_? That punishment was nothing on that of traitors! Trust me! You remember 452?" she smiled "Of course you do. Well when she was on the outside, she had a relationship with Eyes only. We don't know how far it went, but during reprogramming, to protect him I suppose, she made herself forget everything, including him. Now, she is on a mission, one she is very proud of, to kill him. Whether she knows it or not, she has been sent to kill someone she cared about, maybe even loved, and that, my little soldier, is punishment." 494 stood in silence. He'd heard rumours about her and eyes only, but he never thought Manticore would do something like this. _That's sick!_ He thought. To top that off, the last mission he'd been on he'd seen a couple of eyes only hacks, and that guy seemed to be doing good, not bad, so why was Manticore trying to kill him? _Unless they have more to hide than I realised…_Renfro smiled at him. "So now, I'm afraid all you've earned yourself is a long stint in solitary for shouting at you superior, and insubordination, oh and if you ever repeat what you just heard to anyone, you'll never see daylight again. Ok?" Breathing hard, totally furious, all 494 said, in a low, almost growling tone, was,

            "You will never be my superior." Renfro called out for the guards to come and take him away. When they didn't, she called again, starring intently at the open door. 494 looked too, there were always guards out there. As they both watched, 452 appeared in the doorway.

            "I'm afraid they've decided to take a little nap." She hissed. Renfro, terrified, working out how much 452 must have heard, tried to keep her cool.

            "452, what are you doing here? Get me a guard."

            "OK." She answered, leaning out of view, then throwing the limp form of one of the guards towards Renfro. "Don't think he'll be much use though. 494? You been a naughty boy?" she smiled at him. He looked confused, but didn't feel like solitary, and figure that 452 was probably the preferable ally at this time. He smiled back. Renfro lost her cool. 

            "452! You are supposed to be on a deep cover mission! What the hell…"

            "You mean the mission you were telling 494 here about?" she shook her head slightly, "I knew something was going on, but I didn't realise that they were totally right! I actually came back to ask you to screw my head back on about how great Manticore is, but then I heard you, and, well, suddenly a hell of a lot of stuff makes sense, only the opposite way from which I thought it would." Renfro only understood half of this, but was determined to win this war of words,

            "You will report to phy-ops…"

            "No. I wont actually. You lied to me bitch. I've not even been here a year an' a half. I escaped in '09 with the others. What really happened to Zack?" The use of his name even shocked her. 494's face contorted in a pity she didn't understand. But Renfro smiled.

            "You really want to know? There was no mission, you were both outside, involved in the destruction of the lab. You got shot, just as I said, but he was only caught. When he saw you lying there, dead, and the doctors said they couldn't restart your heart, he broke free of his bindings and insisted that they save you. He even offered my heart, pointing a gun at me. But I told him the truth, that only an X5 heart would save you, so he turned the gun on himself, and gave you his heart. He died because of you. It was no lucky coincidence." 452's breath caught in her throat, brief flashes of what Renfro just said came into view. _As the effect of the defibrillator wore of, and blood still flowed to her head, she heard, as if over a great distance, her brother's voice. "Fight them Maxie! Promise me you'll fight them!"_ Renfro was telling the truth, and 452 realised that her brother had really killed himself so that she could live to continue the fight. With a jolt, she also realised that she hadn't. She hadn't fought them, she fought for them! She shook her head, not in disbelief, but in despair.

            "You bitch." She managed. "You took everything from me!" Renfro hit an alarm button at the side as pure rage flared in 452's eyes. 452 made for her, but 494 held her back.

            "452, we have to get out of here, they'll kill you if they get here first!" she tried to push him away, telling him she didn't care, but he forced her to face him. "How can you fight Manticore if you're dead? Are you really gonna throw away your life after what he sacrificed to save you?" she calmed slightly, and met his eyes. 

            "You're right," she said, "But my name is Max."

With a last look of pure hatred at Renfro, Max left, 494 close behind, grabbing Renfro's gun. Referring to what Renfro had told him, 494 grinned at Max,

            "It's a good thing you were exempt from the breeding program, then? We were gonna be together, y'know?" then shaking his head, joking, he said, "We coulda had some good times." She elbowed him and smiled, but hearing running footsteps, she slipped back into soldier mode.

            "We have to get out of here." She said stiffly,

            "Well duh, but there's one other thing we have to do first." She looked a question at him. "We have to get 734."

            "Brin? She more Manticore's soldier than I was!" He nodded, but continued,

            "Until a couple of days ago, when she came back from that mission. She was knackered but Renfro made her do training anyway. We were playing a war game, when she collapsed, causing her team to lose. Renfro freaked, yelling at her," he smiled, "She yelled back, and I saw this look in her eyes. Hell that was scary, but it's the look you used to have, when you were in reprogramming. Renfro chucked her into solitary, she was kickin' and screaming all the way." Max grinned.

            "Y' serious?"

            "Renfro has had it in for her since she failed to stop you guys blowing up the lab. Anyway, we have to get her out." Max nodded.

            "Ok, you go get her, and I'll see about a way out. Hurry!" he nodded, and sped off down the next corridor. Max kept going straight, taking out flustered guards as she went. A minute or two later, she found the door she was looking for. It was locked, _strange_, she thought, _it's never locked_.

            "Don't move a muscle 452. This time there is no escape. I'm gonna get rid of your transgenic ass once and for all." She turned slowly to see Renfro grinning, and pointing a gun straight at her, as were the five guards surrounding her. _Crap_, she thought. Renfro positively beamed as she cocked the gun. Max realised that she was right, there was no way she could possibly take out all those guards before someone got a shot off. She braced herself for impact as a gunshot echoed around the corridor.

Hee hee, don't ya just love cliff hangers!?


	4. Something I Have To Do

Part4

Cindy paced Logan's apartment. She'd told him everything that had passed between her and Max, or the girl that was once Max. He stood by the window, watching the world go by as he often did. They both turned as they heard a soft thump somewhere close by. When Max entered, Cindy stood in front of Logan, defiantly. Logan met Max's eyes the moment she entered, searching for the presence of her former self.

            "Get out of the way Cindy. There's something I have to do." Her face was impassive, even her deep dark eyes showed no emotion.

            "No, Max. I won't let you. You don't know what you're doing, an' you'll hate yourself for it when you do!"

            "Get, out, of, the, way." She said slowly, "Don't make this hard."

            "What?! You're tellin' me…"

            "Do it Cindy." Logan spoke for the first time. "Just get out of the way." She glanced at him, disbelieving, but moved aside. Max nodded slightly. She slowly made her way towards Logan, who swallowed, nervously. Standing right in front of him, Max placed one hand on either side of his head, a gesture that when you know the strength of an X5 is easy to see as aggressive. Looking up into Logan's eyes, she was still. Cindy watched in terror, wondering what her best friend had become. Logan looked down, into a face he had dreamed of for much longer than a year and a half; and a smile quirk one side of her mouth. She reached up, kissing him full on the lips. He caught her and held her up, kissing back. Cindy's eyebrows nearly launched into space as she watched the two embrace passionately. When they came apart, Max was looking up at Logan once again, and a tear rolled down her cheek,

            "I'm so sorry." She whispered. He brushed the tear away with his thumb and held her close.

            "It's ok, everything's gonna be ok." She held him back, sobbing into his chest. Cindy burst into tears, unable to control herself. Across the apartment, there were two more thumps, slightly harder than before, quicker, less controlled. Cindy jumped, turning to the sound. Two figures entered cautiously, a tall, brown haired guy and a shorter, long dark haired girl.

            "Max?" the guy called out, then stopped, seeing her and Logan, who were kissing again, and raised his eyebrows, "Well she said you had some kinda relationship…" Cindy was far more interested in the girl, _I think I'm in heaven, _she breathed to herself. "Max." the guy said again. Max broke away from Logan, looking around, slightly dazed.

            "Oh, Alec. I thought I asked you to wait outside."

            "Uh, huh. But, er…" he pointed upwards, "Choppers." Max snapped out of her dazed state.

            "Oh shit. D'you think they followed us? Did they see you?"

            "No and I don't think so. Hell I don't even know if it was them, but we weren't taking any chances." Max nodded. 

            "That's ok. Oh," she exclaimed seeing the confused expressions on both Logan and Cindy's faces. "Logan, Cindy, this is Alec, and Brin."

            "Brin?" Logan repeated.

            "Yeah, Brin. It's ok, Logan, she's with us. These guys helped me get away." Cindy was still confused,

            "What happened, Max? You freaked, an' ran off, an' I thought…" Max looked sad, and slightly embarrassed,

            "I'm sorry O.C." she hugged her friend, "It's kinda complicated, I didn't mean to scare you, I was just… well, saying 'in a bad way' is a major understatement. I guess I got a lot of explaining to do."

Max looked down at herself, _hmm no holes, don't feel dead, what the? _Renfro collapsed to the ground. The guards, as stunned as Max, just stood there.

            "You ok, little sis'?" asked Brin as she stepped round the corner. Max grinned,

            "I am now." The guards, finally catching up, attacked Brin. Max joined in, and saw 494 coming up from the adjoining corridor that Brin had entered from. "Renfro ambushed me." She told him.

            "Really?" he quipped sarcastically, "I didn't guess." When the guards were all sufficiently unconscious, Max looked sideways at him. 

            "I'm gonna call you Alec." She said,

            "I was just thinkin' he'd need a name." Agreed Brin, "But why Alec?"

            "Y'know, as in 'smart aleck'." Brin smiled broadly,

            "Perfect." Alec looked at the two of them,

            "Whatever."

Max told Logan and Cindy what had happened over the past year and a half, and Brin and Alec what had happened over the past few days. When everyone was satisfied, they were silent, no one knowing what to say next.

            "So what's been goin' on round here?" Asked Max finally.

            "Nothing much. Same-old shit." Cindy answered, but she smiled at Logan. Max caught the glance.

            "What?" she asked. Logan smiled and swung his legs under his chair. It was then that Max realised there was no gentle whirring of motors as he moved. "Oh my god! How?" she cried. 

            "I was wondering when you'd notice. Lydecker hooked me up with a genetics guy, also on the run from Manticore. He helped me, in return for passport, fake ID, and anything else he needed to get out of their sights." He looked down at his legs, "He was good." Max laughed shortly,

            "Apparently." She hugged Logan, "I'm so happy for you." Cindy raised her eyes brows; anyone who knew her would be able to read her look as "happy for him? That's not all your happy about…" Alec just looked clueless.

            "I think I missed something." Max glanced at him.

            "Logan was paralysed from the waist down."

            "Oh." He looked very pitying, "Well, good for you." Max laughed again, a little erratically. Then she seemed to be considering something. "D'you still have all those safe-houses, Logan?" he nodded. "It's just that these guys are gonna need somewhere to stay." Brin finally spoke up,

            "That's ok, I'll probably get moving right away." Alec was annoyed.

            "Don't be dumb. You need to rest, stay put for a while. You were knackered before you spent three days in solitary. We'd _both_ be grateful if you had somewhere we could stay for a while." The last part to Logan, who nodded immediately.

            An hour later Alec and Brin were both fast asleep in a guest room and Max, Logan and Cindy sat in the living room. 

            "Aren't you tired?" Max asked Cindy.

            "Na, bu. I hadn't even thought about it. Its great to have you back girl." Max's smile faded, and she looked down. When she spoke, it was barely audible.

            "I'm so sorry."

            "For what girl?" Max looked up, almost sharply.

            "For what? I almost killed you. Both of you! Hell, Logan if you hadn't said my name, an' freaked me out… I betrayed you." Logan shook his head fiercely.

            "No, Max. No you didn't. You went through months of torture and never told them anything about any of us. You gave yourself up to them so that you could ensure you would never say anything."

            "Uh-huh, and that worked so well."

            "Bu, listen to yourself! You're being dumb. There was no way you could ever know what Renfro would do! And any way, the point is, you didn't hurt us. In fact, you saved me."

            "Yeah, after I pushed you." Tears were rolling swiftly down her cheeks. "You guys just don't understand. You can't, I don't expect you to. When I started to remember stuff, up on the space needle, I started to freak, right?" Cindy nodded, "Well it wasn't because I was thinking, oh my god I'm a traitor, or, Manticore have been lying to me, I was thinking, none of this can be true, because if it is, then I've spent a year working for the enemy. If all this is true, then all those missions I've done, people I've… people I've killed, may not have been justified after all. I've wasted Zack's gift. Just before he killed himself, he told me to fight them. Well I didn't. I didn't fight them; I fought for them. I've been doing Manticore's dirty work for a year, Logan! I've … _disposed_ of eyes-only operatives! I've _silenced_ people running from Manticore! I have become what I've been running from half my life!" Neither Cindy nor Logan knew what to say, because Max was right, there was no possible way for them to understand how she felt. All Logan could do was hold her in his arm and try to provide some comfort. She tried to push him away, but he just held tighter. Eventually, he managed to speak,

            "You're right, maybe we can't understand. But I do know that none of it is your fault, and I also know that you are not gonna be alone in this. I'm here for you Max, I'm so sorry I ever left you." Max finally held him back, sobbing like Cindy had never seen her sob before. 

            The next morning, Logan gave them details of a safe house Alec and Brin could use and gave them the fake ID's he'd got for them. _He hasn't changed_ Max thought, smiling.

            "Thanks for this Logan." She said, "I'll show them the way." Alec looked a little confused,

            "What are you going to do?" without waiting for Max to reply, Cindy jumped in,

            "She's coming back home wit' me!" Max grinned at her friend.

            "It's not over though guys," She said, the smile fading a little, "Cos Manticore have the search narrowed down to only about three sectors of Seattle, and if I broke your security, then they will too." Logan dismissed this point,

            "We'll cross that bridge when we come to it. And you only got through my security cos you knew how!" he acted hurt at her suggestion that his precautions weren't good enough.

            "But I didn't know I knew!"

            "But even if you didn't know you knew, you know you still knew…" Alec butted in,

            "Ok ok, slow down guys, those of us with normal sized brains are finding this conversation slightly hard to follow. Some how you knew Max, ok? Don't even think about making out that you're just so clever that you worked it all out in a minute flat!" he grinned cheekily, but was glad that he wasn't standing next to her, she had sharp elbows.

Later-Cindy and Max's apartment

Max was going through her wardrobe; all her stuff was still there,          

            "I just felt that if I got rid of all your stuff then you were really gone." Cindy had smiled to her friend. Now Max looked at the clothes, noting low cut tops and tight trousers and feeling slightly uncomfortable, it had been over a year since she'd worn anything like that. She held up a glittery one shouldered top,

            "I wore this?" she exclaimed. Cindy laughed,

            "Only once that I can remember, Bu. Y'know, to get into that gangster casino?" Max thought for a moment, then laughed,

            "When Sketchy lost their money, right? I remember." She felt so awkward with all these memories, because although she remembered most stuff, some things were still a little fuzzy round the edges, and she was constantly terrified that she would forget something important. Cindy was looking at her oddly,

            "You ai-aight, bu? Why don't you get on with it and put something on? You'll remember once you get used to it again!" Max looked unsure, causing Cindy to laugh again.

            "Hey, stop laughing at me!"

            "I'm sorry, girl, I'm sorry, come on, I'll show you, then we can go surprise everyone at Crash. You should call Alec and that damn fine female of a sister of yours, they could come too, and Logan." Max laughed at the Brin comment and gave her friend a wobbly smile, she really wasn't sure about a big crowd of people who all thought she was dead until the second they see her, _it'll be…interesting, at least_ she convinced herself.


End file.
